Yes, THANK YOU! I changed my physical and mental health more radically with a clean diet, sunshine, outdoor exercise and daily gratitude to my Maker, than any prescription or therapy ever offered me. I am lighter in every possible way. And I can only fully witness and appreciate this new state of being as a stark contrast to the years I lived in its absence.
I would do anything to have everyone in the world read this. Victimhood is throwing hope and joy into the toilet and most of our therapists are doing the flushing.
The therapist who told me there was nothing wrong with me, saved me. She explained that I am a perfectly working system and that I just needed to trust myself. She explained that my symptoms were simply information that there were things in my life that needed to change — including many of my relationships. She was right. I learned to listen to what my physical symptoms and feelings were telling me and changed my life accordingly. After that, all of my symptoms went away. That having been said, I hate the phrase “victim mentality,” as it erases the truth that many people are victims of difficult circumstances that are very hard, if not impossible, to escape from.
I get what you're saying, but the phrase "victim mentality" refers to a particular mindset. It's not just a blanket condemnation of anyone who is a victim of tragedy or circumstance, but of the type of person who would PREFER TO BE a victim, rather than take responsibility for their life.
Fair enough but it reminds me of terms in women’s health like geriatric pregnancy, lazy ovary and incompetent cervix. Are these terms helpful? (Men who can’t get erections are diagnosed with “erectile dysfunction,” not with a geriatric, lazy or incompetent penis.) How about empowerment mindset versus disempowerment mindset? It is less shaming and more accurate.
Agree about the "victim mentality." It's a completely unnecessary guilt trip -- it's pathologizing the recognition of reality. Victims and victors are real. Just like prey and predators are real. The value is in the cognitive shift from "why me?" to "what now?" You can counsel this without heaping another pathology label on a struggling person's head.
Good stuff. Thank you. I read it as a Christian - God is inviting me to acknowledge my pain & steadily grow. Victim mentality is crippling. But I do lean hard on God’s comforting presence.
Christian doctrine has always recognized that mankind is broken, but that it's ok, because God always planned on working with that in mind. "since before the Foundations of the World."
So incredibly strong. I have been saying for years (to vitriol-laced mockery) that I firmly believe that no one is designed nor destined to be straddled to SSRIs their entire life. I refuse to reduce the human condition to that premise.
Thank you so very much Dr. McFillin for stating what needs to be said so perfectly. Thrilled to find someone working in the medical profession that's on my wavelength, speaking truth to power and helping to make a profound and necessary difference in a real and relatable way.
God Bless you & everyone reading. It's a joy to be part of a readership and community who share such warmth and wisdom and find it refreshing to be radically genuine. 143 ❤️♾️
This is a goldmine. I recently wrote something in a similar vein to this article on depression and addiction. Great to see that what I believe holds up with you.
I was told I was Bipolar and medicated for 30 years. It ruined my life, caused my divorce and stunted where I could have gone in life. Last year I just stopped taking the meds and I've never felt better. My GP literally said "I don't have time for this." The psych nurse set in place all sorts of emergency protocols and terrified my husband with "when she relapses". I didn't. Nothing happened. No withdrawal symptoms, no nothing. Just a clear head.
It’s been 20 years for me. Bipolar, adhd, schizoaffective, ptsd… Name it and they tell me I have it. Like, come on, people, wtf. Anyway, I’m thinking of just stopping the meds as well. I want my mind back. I remember who I once was, and sure I could be a problem - mostly for myself but for others as well - but I was 20 years younger and learned a lot from the life I was living, wild / desolate as it was. I want me back. It will be interesting to meet that unmedicated girl as a 44 year old unmedicated woman who’s really seen some shit hahaha. If that even makes sense.
Last year my dad was diagnosed with stage IV cancer. It has been a really difficult year for him and for our family. But it forced me, finally, to retire the old conception of myself as a victim of circumstance. Because I had to show up for my dad. I needed to let go of my resentments so that I could care for him with joy in my heart. He needed me to be strong for him. I don’t want the time he has left to be tinged with any of that resentment stuff.
And each time I came close to releasing an old story of victimhood it plunged me into a really deep depression. I came to realize though that these depressions really were a kind of ego death and that I could come out of them. If I yielded to the death cycle it would last two or three weeks of feeling really awful. and then something new would come up. Feelings of gratitude or empowerment. I look back on previous depressions I tried to medicate out of and I realize all it did was delay the necessary death of old beliefs and keep me stuck in old stories. My life never got better until I got off antidepressants and allowed the spiritual putrefaction to be completed. For a seed to give birth to a flower, first it must die.
Lots of money to be made and control to be had by medicallizing normal human experience and emotions. First became aware of this when I worked in a psychiatric hospital in the 1970s
Well, we'll, you are one hell of a doctor, Sir! This is so refreshing, to read that a trained person such as you can take this pragmatic approach. If you were over here in Shangri-La I'd be recommending every struggler from my counselling practice to yours....
Yes, THANK YOU! I changed my physical and mental health more radically with a clean diet, sunshine, outdoor exercise and daily gratitude to my Maker, than any prescription or therapy ever offered me. I am lighter in every possible way. And I can only fully witness and appreciate this new state of being as a stark contrast to the years I lived in its absence.
I would do anything to have everyone in the world read this. Victimhood is throwing hope and joy into the toilet and most of our therapists are doing the flushing.
"Tell the psychiatric priesthood to go fuck themselves with their DSM bibles."
YES!!! I felt more alive by the second while reading this!! Connection, purpose, meaning - these are the things our souls crave most.
The therapist who told me there was nothing wrong with me, saved me. She explained that I am a perfectly working system and that I just needed to trust myself. She explained that my symptoms were simply information that there were things in my life that needed to change — including many of my relationships. She was right. I learned to listen to what my physical symptoms and feelings were telling me and changed my life accordingly. After that, all of my symptoms went away. That having been said, I hate the phrase “victim mentality,” as it erases the truth that many people are victims of difficult circumstances that are very hard, if not impossible, to escape from.
I get what you're saying, but the phrase "victim mentality" refers to a particular mindset. It's not just a blanket condemnation of anyone who is a victim of tragedy or circumstance, but of the type of person who would PREFER TO BE a victim, rather than take responsibility for their life.
Fair enough but it reminds me of terms in women’s health like geriatric pregnancy, lazy ovary and incompetent cervix. Are these terms helpful? (Men who can’t get erections are diagnosed with “erectile dysfunction,” not with a geriatric, lazy or incompetent penis.) How about empowerment mindset versus disempowerment mindset? It is less shaming and more accurate.
Amen
Agree about the "victim mentality." It's a completely unnecessary guilt trip -- it's pathologizing the recognition of reality. Victims and victors are real. Just like prey and predators are real. The value is in the cognitive shift from "why me?" to "what now?" You can counsel this without heaping another pathology label on a struggling person's head.
Good stuff. Thank you. I read it as a Christian - God is inviting me to acknowledge my pain & steadily grow. Victim mentality is crippling. But I do lean hard on God’s comforting presence.
Christian doctrine has always recognized that mankind is broken, but that it's ok, because God always planned on working with that in mind. "since before the Foundations of the World."
So incredibly strong. I have been saying for years (to vitriol-laced mockery) that I firmly believe that no one is designed nor destined to be straddled to SSRIs their entire life. I refuse to reduce the human condition to that premise.
Thank you so very much Dr. McFillin for stating what needs to be said so perfectly. Thrilled to find someone working in the medical profession that's on my wavelength, speaking truth to power and helping to make a profound and necessary difference in a real and relatable way.
God Bless you & everyone reading. It's a joy to be part of a readership and community who share such warmth and wisdom and find it refreshing to be radically genuine. 143 ❤️♾️
This is a goldmine. I recently wrote something in a similar vein to this article on depression and addiction. Great to see that what I believe holds up with you.
I was told I was Bipolar and medicated for 30 years. It ruined my life, caused my divorce and stunted where I could have gone in life. Last year I just stopped taking the meds and I've never felt better. My GP literally said "I don't have time for this." The psych nurse set in place all sorts of emergency protocols and terrified my husband with "when she relapses". I didn't. Nothing happened. No withdrawal symptoms, no nothing. Just a clear head.
It’s been 20 years for me. Bipolar, adhd, schizoaffective, ptsd… Name it and they tell me I have it. Like, come on, people, wtf. Anyway, I’m thinking of just stopping the meds as well. I want my mind back. I remember who I once was, and sure I could be a problem - mostly for myself but for others as well - but I was 20 years younger and learned a lot from the life I was living, wild / desolate as it was. I want me back. It will be interesting to meet that unmedicated girl as a 44 year old unmedicated woman who’s really seen some shit hahaha. If that even makes sense.
I wish I could off Paxil like that. Going mostly off is ok. All the way turned me into a raging monster.
Last year my dad was diagnosed with stage IV cancer. It has been a really difficult year for him and for our family. But it forced me, finally, to retire the old conception of myself as a victim of circumstance. Because I had to show up for my dad. I needed to let go of my resentments so that I could care for him with joy in my heart. He needed me to be strong for him. I don’t want the time he has left to be tinged with any of that resentment stuff.
And each time I came close to releasing an old story of victimhood it plunged me into a really deep depression. I came to realize though that these depressions really were a kind of ego death and that I could come out of them. If I yielded to the death cycle it would last two or three weeks of feeling really awful. and then something new would come up. Feelings of gratitude or empowerment. I look back on previous depressions I tried to medicate out of and I realize all it did was delay the necessary death of old beliefs and keep me stuck in old stories. My life never got better until I got off antidepressants and allowed the spiritual putrefaction to be completed. For a seed to give birth to a flower, first it must die.
Lots of money to be made and control to be had by medicallizing normal human experience and emotions. First became aware of this when I worked in a psychiatric hospital in the 1970s
💯 this!
Well, we'll, you are one hell of a doctor, Sir! This is so refreshing, to read that a trained person such as you can take this pragmatic approach. If you were over here in Shangri-La I'd be recommending every struggler from my counselling practice to yours....
Love never fails 🌾
Wow!!! This hit. So grateful to have stumbled upon. Sharing with all who will benefit!
Bravo! Thank you for saying the things that we’re not supposed to say out loud. 👏👏👏👏👏
Superb.